30 days hath september {happy first birthday, liam}

30 days hath september,

and oh,

where have the days gone?

I picked you up out of your crib this morning and sang you happy birthday. 

Without warning, my voice cracked, my throat choked up, and the tears slowly streamed down my face.

My baby, my sweet, sweet, baby, you have turned one today. 

You went from this...

 to 

this...

 a standing, into everything, stuffed animal loving, giggling, happy, happy boy!

Tell me, where oh where

did the time go?

I will find out on Thursday how much you weigh and how tall you are,
but what I can say about you right now is that you are the most happy,

loving boy.
You love your siblings and your daddy,

you are inquisitive in every sense of the word.

It doesn't take much to make you smile,

and I can tell that you are thinking about how this big world works every minute

of every day.

You are a jokester...

and a romantic,

rolled up into one.
Every day I ask you for my kiss and you say, "mmm" and attempt to give me your most slobbery of slobbery baby kisses.
We think that you say mama and dada and you definitely wave hello.
You eat everything in sight, I actually don't know where you put it because you often eat a total of what Kieran, Anna and Tatum eat combined!
Each of them compete for your attention, each of them have a unique relationship with you.
They love you fiercely.
You, like your siblings, are a mama's boy, but when you are in my arms and reach for your daddy, your love is overflowing and evident.
You are still crawling, but scaling walls and couches and you often stand on your own without even realizing it. You clap your hands, play peek a boo, blow your food when it's hot.
You hug us tight and we know that you are telling us how much you love us.
I am in awe of your love, in awe that God chose us to be your parents.
You are an amazing baby, an amazing one year old boy.

I promise to love you with all my heart, and all my might.

I am sad that your baby days have moved into toddlerhood, 

but my heart bursts at the seams thinking of the child that you are and the man that you will become.

You are such a special human being.

A blessed soul.

Happy 1st Birthday, my sweet baby.

30 days hath September, plus three hundred and thirty five more,

and oh,

how I have savored every moment.

With Love,

Mommy

perspective

Sometimes, when I least expect it, my children teach me things. Sometimes through words, other times through actions.

In his case, he's days shy from one, but he's taught me so many lessons.

There are many bumps in life's road and I think so often that if those bumps didn't exist well then, I wouldn't be alive.

Today,

I've learned perspective.

He only wants to go one direction, there's no appeal to coming down.

Today I've learned perspective,

and there's only one way to go, but up.

a bunch of fun {soccer season}

It's soccer season!

Hooray!

Anna couldn't be happier, especially since it's her first time playing, ever.

All I asked her was to take her picture...

and she came up with this pose. I kid you not, there was no instruction here whatsoever.

She's super focused when she plays,

and apparently needs her tongue out for full concentration.

Either that or it's a family thing!

When you're five, it's also about a "bunch" of fun.

Bunch ball, that is, and sometimes even without the ball.

"P", get it? {oh, Anna!}

I love this girl...

and while it's quite obvious that she has an older brother when you hang out with her, she has a spirit of her own. She tells it like it is, she is a jokester.

There are times when I know that I'm supposed to correct her, and it's all I can do to bite my tongue and keep the laughter from spilling right out of me. 

Most of the time, I can't fight it.

I took Anna to her Kindergarten assessment to see whether she would be an early worker or late worker in the reading schedule.

As I stapled packets for her teacher in the back of the room, I quietly listened to her responses.

Sometimes she answered correctly, sometimes not, but all in eagerness to answer.

So eager that her teacher asked, "What does the "p" sound make?"

Anna's answer? 

Pee, get it?

Oh, Anna. 

She made me snicker in the back of the Kindergarten classroom.

Luckily, it went over her teacher's head.

Love this girl...

fake summer {labor day weekend}

We had such a great weekend with family and friends...

swimming in the pool, eating ice cream at Aunt Jessica and Uncle Richard's restaurant...

it kind of felt like "fake summer".

The last hurrah.

It made today feel like a Monday, even though it was a Tuesday.

I miss it already...

Back to School, Take Your Time

It's official. I blinked. They blinked. Summer was over and school started.

Tatum went to four days of the summer session of preschool and her first "real" day of school is next week. She is having a hard time, but getting better each day! Liam is officially 11 months old today as I write in the wee hours of the morning. It's official alright, I'm a mama to an almost one year old, a brand new preschooler and you two...

a Kindergarten girl and a Second grade boy!

I wish that I could say that over the summer I was able to fully move us in and get everything settled, but I'm still unpacking a few boxes and still trying to sort through the junk that I should have thrown away before we moved. Your daddy is working away in his fully finished garage (I need to take progress pictures before he's actually done!) because as he says, "the garage is the heart of the home". Whaaaat?

I feel the morning rush, though I'm trying to be better about getting up earlier and being prepared! "Take your time!", Anna so wisely says.

 The night before school started, I found Kieran sneaking the ipad in the darkness. I was quick to get angry, upset with myself for doing so, especially after he came running into my arms and said, "I'm sorry, Mommy! It's just that I'm scared for second grade!" "Oh, Kieran!", my heart sinking inside. "I am the one who is sorry, I wasn't thinking and now I see that you were trying to settle your mind!" Clearly, I forgot to put on my school counselor hat and was in "do this, do that" parent mode.

We sat, we talked, we cuddled.

"It will be okay", I told him. "You will be great!"

And it was, he was.

Kieran's teacher is on maternity leave, so he has a long-term substitute until late October. My sweet, loving boy hugged his teacher knowing that she is only with him for a short stay. Kieran, may you never lose the love you have for others, even when you've never met them. This is a quality that not a lot of people have and so many should. 

Anna waited patiently with her big brother to wish him a great first day of second grade. 

Then, a quick moment to remember the two of us on this day, 

 her first day of Kindergarten.

This day meant so much to her and even more so because I was able to stay the day with all of the other parents that stay with their children on the first day. I cannot even put into words the excitement and wonder that she had anticipating her first day, a day that I am so glad that I did not miss!

Anna's teacher rolled out the red carpet for her students,

took their movie star pictures,

 and gave hugs to every student like they were her own.

 This is one happy girl!

And so, before I blink and blink again, my loves, my prayer is that I will take my time for you, be there for you, and love you the way that you need.

I will slow down, I will just be.

I can't get these years back, so I'll enjoy them in the moment.

May Kindergarten and Second grade be a wonderful step in your long journey.

I love you both and by the way...

take your time!

i'm bored...{the challenges of 7 and a half}

While taking pictures of Liam, Kieran laid down next to me with "the look".

I get it a lot lately and when I tell him, he ends up giggling, because he knows exactly what I'm talking about. "Where's my Kieran? Where's my sweet baby?", I ask him.

His smile returns because he knows that when he says he's bored, it really just means I want you to pay attention to me. 

It's easy to get lost taking pictures of the girls because they actually want me to and will often ask. It's even easier to take pictures of Liam since he's the baby baby, and invariably, the last.

Kieran's my first though, and I'm learning each day how much I don't know about parenting a 7 and a half year old. 

I honestly feel like he is in between the "whatever Mommy says, I'll do without thinking stage, to the I'm becoming quite the independent little guy stage...as it should, but I can't say that I always like it.

It has nothing to do with me, and everything to do with him and that's the part that is so difficult. 

That being said, I'm learning about empathy with limits;

limit setting to let him know that I care, while thinking on his level to best understand him.

When all else fails and he says he's bored, there's nothing that a good hug cannot cure, along with a good dose of being tickled. 

And, when he says, "I'm bored",

that's my cue.