Monday, August 14, 2017

my hard drive is full and so is my heart {first day of school 2017}

I haven't posted anything since October of last year. October! Before we know it, it will be October and I will have almost an entire year of thoughts in my mind and pictures to go along with that were never written about. So it seems only logical to me that although those events definitely happened and I never wrote about them, it will make for a great throwback or flashback for several weeks to come.
Truthfully, my computer is PAINFULLY disorganized and I've been working the last several nights on photo organization. Part of the reason I haven't written in so long is that I have almost next to zero hard drive space, as in full, as in my computer is so disorganized that I can only upload my jpegs and not the original files to edit them the way I'd like.
That said, if I continue to wait, I will be so behind that all I'll ever be writing about is past events and never catch up.
It makes sense then to keep up until I catch up with unedited photos (even in their messiness). Afterall, I created my blog as my gift to my children and if you happen to stumble across it and get to the end well, thank you.
I'm not a supermom, I don't have any cooking tips or party ideas to share with you. I cannot coach you on fitness or healthy eating as I'm learning to do those things myself. I can't give you any style tips because I leave that to personal stylists or friends who actually have a gift for that sort of thing. My home is not drenched in farmhouse white (which by the way, I absolutely swoon over) and some days I wonder what God's big plan is for me, what is my purpose?
Never though, do I doubt even for a second that I wasn't meant to be a wife to my husband and a mama to my kids.
My heart was full today because I sent my boy off to sixth grade.
Fresh new haircut and all and my sweet boy says that he "wishes I was 99% still working at his middle school as the school counselor". He might not think that if I were actually there, but it still melts my heart. I've said it before and I'll say it again, he has a heart of gold.
He had a great day and the best part is that he is with all of my former colleagues/friends who I know will take good care of him.
I'm not sure how we got here. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was pregnant with him and sleeping on the floor of my office in between scheduling? Wasn't it just yesterday that I pushed these two in the stroller while pregnant with Tatum on my way to work?
Now he's there himself. It's just surreal.
Next up, the spunky one of the group.
Miss "Never Give Up" herself...
who rode her new hand me down cruiser from our next door neighbor.
She thinks she's pretty awesome and without telling her so her head doesn't get too big, I do too!
Third in line is so precious that she picked out her first day of school dress from the Old Navy uniform section. 
Nevermind that I bought her shoes on sale for her last year thinking they'd fit. My tiny girl who asks when she's going to grow. 
And then there's Mr.BB8
He's going on his first ever plane ride in September to Disneyland! Each TK or Kinder year with our kids, Erik takes them for a Daddy/Kid trip complete with pictures, videos set to music and an incredible bonding experience. I am so excited for them and sad at the same time because Liam is the last! I cringed at buying these shoes but he went straight for them. And I even let him wear them today. My mom had the best advice for this "daunting issue", and it all comes down to what makes you happy! 
A BB8 and R2D2 lunch box and water bottle coupled with some stylin' BB8 shoes?
It makes for one happy four, soon to be five year old!
Prepped with folders and original artwork for the inside of her desk,
my girl who has endured a really bumpy road with her health this last year,
is so very lucky to have yet another incredible teacher.
And this little girl has been writing letters (that we still have to send) to her Kindergarten teacher all summer long. Mrs. B is Tatum's idol, but I also know she's the reason that she loves school and the reason she already loves her new teacher, Mrs. M.
I just don't want to forget her little red dress or her blue with gold hearts backpack, 
or this spontaneous hug goodbye.
 I don't want to forget him smiling for his teacher as they celebrated Clifford the big red dog's 5th birthday (since everyone in TK will be turning five).
 I don't ever want to forget the excitement of getting his first tote bag,
or showing off his "kiss" after Mrs. C read The Kissing Hand.
And this. This completely out of focus picture that I will never part ways.
I just can't, no matter what any decluttering minimalism konmarie method person would say.
Why? Because this out of focus picture is real time. Unposed, she was coming at me so quickly I missed the "perfect capture" by a split second. This out of focus picture taking up more space on my already full hard drive is the happiest first grader on the planet who cannot wait to go back in the morning.
This out of focus picture brings me joy because that's what she was feeling and it gives me a reminder that my pictures don't need to be perfect to post.
I haven't even written about the last day of school yet, but we'll just add that to the list of my back to the future posts.
My hard drive is full and so is my heart.
Time to make space for more memories and savor them for as long as I can.
Love to all of you my sweet babies.
May you have a wonderful school year!




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